I am in the middle-passage of a case of the Flu. I know how and why people die from this- they give up. I was trying to figure out how to describe my physical state- I mean the sensation of it. I came home on Monday at about three in the afternoon and went to bed. I immediately entered a state of semi-consciousness where I stayed for about a day- but I didn't dream- (not that I know of, anyway.) Instead it seemed as if I was fully conscious of myself within myself. The outer self was as a great cavern of discomfort- every motion was only at the result of some massive effort- successive waves of arctic wind followed by desert wind followed by arctic wind, rolled through it. And I was alone in this cavern- I remember myself thinking, "hey, I can think.....that must mean that I'm still alive."
So far, I've survivied the worst part and look forward to a return to my fully functional status (whatever that was/is.) But this gave me an idea that perhaps in the future, there will be people who gather around the idea of sponsoring events that allow the participants to enter a state of near death. Oh, wait, that's a Siggur Ros concert.
(I really like Siggur Ros.)